Be Honest

There’s no progress or healing from anything until you are honest with the circumstances. The first step in alcohol anonymous or in any recovery plan is first admitting there is a problem. I know one of my struggles is when I admit there’s a problem it’s almost like me admitting that I failed or obviously did something wrong.  I want to invite you into a spiritual space in your thinking.  Admitting the truth actually gets you ten steps closer into the reality you want to see.

As parents and advocates for our children we have to first admit there is a problem. The earlier we admit there’s a problem the better but getting to a place of truth is better than never getting there at all.

Imagine you’re in an art class and the instructor gives you a blank canvas and tells you they want you to paint what they have on their canvas but you haven’t even seen their canvas and you start painting. Once the instructor shows you their painting you notice that your painting is not at all what they wanted you to paint, sometimes I feel like that’s what happens with our children. When they are born we have this full canvas painted for what their life will be minus a few little details and when their life isn’t being created on their canvas like we painted for them then we sometimes feel this sense of guilt and or shame. Special education is not on many parents canvas they paint for their child unless of course they were born with developmental delays of any sort.

When mentally considering special education services for a child you initially, well at least for me, think of all of the old school ideas of special education which tends to paralyze your mind in that moment to not look any further. One way to think of it is when you’re completely healthy you go see your primary care provider and no need to go see a specialist. Once something in your health changes your PCP recommends you to a specialist who specializes in that specific field. This is the same with special education. A general education teacher is the “primary care provider” once they see something is wrong they may recommend you to a specialist (special education services) the sooner your child is being seen my the specialist, and the intervention is put in place the closer you are to managing your child’s challenges and in many cases full inclusion back into the general education setting, if they ever even left.

All children with some sort of delay does not need special education services. There are a lot of children who can sufficiently handle a few slight interventions and supports in the general education setting and succeed with no other support needed. Then there are some of our children who need intensive support and that’s okay too. We have to be honest with ourselves about what is really going on and take action whether that’s seeking a second opinion or agreeing and teaming up with the school staff to put supports in place. Take some time and really survey your child’s situation

  1. Is there a problem?
  2. Have support interventions or Special education services been recommended?
  3. Are they capable of hurting themselves or others?
  4. Do you hesitate to send them places other than school because of their behavior?
  5. Have anyone in your “village” every stated concerns?
  6. Are you afraid of the stares or reputation that may come with special services?

“Empower yourself with the truth so you don’t paralyze your child’s potential”.